Failure is an event; not a person

Those of you who have either read or learnt NLP know of one of the presuppositions of NLP and it goes, “there is no failure; only feedback.” And it is a great, workable reframing. It is progressive in nature and to an extent, evolutionary as well.

Today, we will look at “The I-am-too-important” Phenomena. There are 7.2 billion people on earth at the moment and more as I write and each thing that happens and is said is taken personal by people who have this phenomena.

I want to tell those humans today… Guys, sorry, life is not personal… It is not about taking things personally… None of the situations in life came to either trouble you or do you a favour! The design of life is empty… And empty in a good way! Imagine you are wearing spectacles… What colour do the glasses have? Well, the colour that you put on! Transparent ones have no colour, shiny ones shine, photo chromatic change colour with sunlight… But in itself, glasses have no colour… The colour you gave them is the colour they have!

That is exactly how life is… there is nothing to it… S P A C E… so you put in what you want. Because a lot of time we don’t consciously choose what to put in, the space clutters with doubt, the downward spiral of negativity and the “am I good enough”/ “life is unfair” nightmarish rhyme.

With that being said, why will any person or situation have anything to do with you on a personal basis? Each one has their glasses of different colours on and they see the world as the glasses are so what they say to you is what they think and not what the truth is! Rem ember, change the colour, change the reality!

Similarly, anything in life that does not give you the result you expected is not taking out its trash on you, neither is it being unfair nor is it defining you in anyway. We choose to get defined by events, results and what people say about us but it is a choice.

So next time when you don’t get the result you want, either apply, “it is only feedback- course correction is required and move ahead” or remember, “I failed at doing this this time; I am not a failure.”

Remember, NOTHING PERSONAL!

A GREAT RESOURCE TO READ: THE FOUR AGREEMENTS BY DONE JOSE RUIZ- https://www.amazon.in/Four-Agreements-Practical-Personal-Freedom/dp/1878424319/ref=sr_1_1?crid=27INQCA1S6R4Y&keywords=four+agreements+book&qid=1650739569&sprefix=four+agree%2Caps%2C214&sr=8-1